It's just me today. No guest, no questions. Just me and everything that's been sitting in my head since my birthday.

Here's the thing about turning 36. I thought I didn't want anything. No plans, no production, phone off, in my robe by 9pm. Then a small part of me panicked that maybe I was supposed to want more. And then the day fell apart on its own, nothing went the way it was meant to, and it landed as exactly what I needed. Which caught me off guard, because a year ago I would have planned the whole thing down to the minute and called that self-care.

And that turned out to be the theme of the whole year, not just the day. I don't want every year of my life to be preparation for a better one that's always a little further up ahead.

So in this one I get into the rest of it. The work summit where I walked into a room full of people who knew more than me, and for the first time the what-am-I-doing-here voice just didn't show up. The morning I realized I'd been checking an app to find out how I slept, when I was the one who slept. The strange freedom of not totally knowing who I am right now, and being more okay with that than I expected to be. And the three words I'm carrying into this year, which are very much not the ones I would have picked five years ago, back when my only word was more.

Nobody tells you that the thing that got you here isn't always the thing that gets you where you're going next. That's the part I'm still in.

This one's for the woman who did everything right and still feels like her real life is somewhere up ahead. You're not behind. You might just be allowed to enjoy the one you're already in.

Follow Valeria:

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/valerialipovetsky

TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@valeria.lipovetsky

YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/ValeriaLipovetsky

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/valerialipovetskyblog

Follow Not Alone:

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/notalonepod

TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@notalone.pod

Podcast: https://www.notalonepod.com/

Shop

Shop my look from this episode: https://shopmy.us/collections/8080430

Amazon Storefront: https://www.amazon.com/shop/valerialipovetsky

‍

What We Talked About:

0:00 Just me today, no guest

1:00 What I thought I wanted for my birthday

2:30 The day fell apart and became exactly what I needed

4:00 Don't celebrate me, but also celebrate me

5:30 Nobody can read your mind, not even a man in a chef costume

7:00 I can buy my own flowers, I just don't want to

8:30 Your partner needs the update

10:00 The investing panel, and the room full of people who knew more

12:00 The what-am-I-doing-here voice that finally went quiet

14:00 Qualified and a beginner in the same room

15:30 The opposite of a thought leader

17:30 Less sure of myself, and happier for it

19:00 The energy healer and the Oura ring

21:00 When taking care of myself turned into grading myself

23:00 My easygoing era was a performance

25:00 No is a complete sentence

26:30 The nails post, and what do you mean I have a choice

28:00 Rosh Hashanah, and the word around the table

29:30 The men said business, the women said play

31:00 Taking the permission to play, and booking Paris

32:30 The three words I'm carrying into this year

34:00 The thing that got you here isn't what gets you there next

35:30 You might just be allowed to enjoy the life you're in

‍